Now Presenting Your Passing Opportunity

    I get frustrated with God. I can even say I've been angry with God. For a long time I believed that these feelings were horrible. How could I, a mere human, feel this way toward God? How disrespectful could I be to question the creator of the universe? Then a really good mentor of mine corrected me. Anger is only destructive when you use it to push away from a relationship. I think sometimes I see my emotions as human. But in reality, my emotions are just another reflection of the very creator I was made in the image of. Emotions are not what become destructive in our relationships. It is how we choose to react that can be destructive. With my anger will I turn away from God? Or will I instead choose to look God in the spiritual face and say "Hey I don't understand this. I am so mad and frustrated with you. But I am going to choose to trust that you have this."
   I am a very prideful person. I like to believe I can take care of myself in every way. But the truth is, I need God more then I care to let on. I think there might defiantly be some control issues in there as well (just a guess really). At the same time, I know I can accomplish so much more with God working through me. So as a clumsy Christian working my way through life, I do the only thing I can do. I pray. I pray for my prideful ways, I pray for patience, I pray for a deeper relationship with God, I ask that he helps my fiance and I put him first in our lives. I don't think I ever give enough credit to the power of prayer. God answers my prayers. But I have to say, he always seems to find a way to throw me a spiritual curve ball. I never seem to be able to anticipate these curve balls either. So I tend to strike out leaving me frustrated and annoyed. How dare you God answer my prayers in a way that I don't like.

        Isaiah 55:8-9 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts. Nor are your ways My ways." says the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts."


       Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hop."

    Oh yeah, I guess that's why you dare. The funny thing is that after striking out a few times, I am actually starting to be able to hit some right out of the park. Lessons are hard sometimes. There are moments where I feel like I am never going to get it right. Then there are other times that I feel like I've got it only to realize I forgotten my lesson down the road. It is so very frustrating to be reminded on a daily basis that I am not perfect. With each emotional failure I have a God who is there pulling me back up. It's never going to be easy but who ever said this path was the easiest one to choose. After all, my creator made me to love challenges and to never give up.Instead of letting my emotions get in the way, perhaps I can use them to learn what it is God has presented me with. Too often I pass on an opportunity because I am too busy throwing a pity party for myself. Like my grandmother always says, "time to put on the big girl panties", and stop missing out on God given opportunities. 

Okay God ready for the next pitch. Oh tee ball now God? Lesson in pride? Should have saw that coming......